By Libby Byxbee
The author, now in high school, getting ear molds for her first pair of hearing aids at age 4.
From the age of 4 until now at 15, I have always worn hearing aids to treat my hearing loss, diagnosed at birth. My experience has not been especially difficult, but it has created challenges and obstacles throughout my life.
In lower elementary school I was introduced to the
FM receiver, a type of assistive listening technology. At the age of 6 this was the worst thing that could have possibly happened to me. It was bulky, loud, and very noticeable.
The first time I used it was during class in 1st grade. My teacher placed it around her neck, and at first it went unnoticed, but then it started to raise questions. People would always ask her, “what is that?” or “why do you have it?”
I knew the answer to that question but my 1st grade teacher usually replied something like, “It is for someone special,” and I would immediately ignore her and stare at the ground.
When I got older and went into 2nd and 3rd grade,
I had brand new classmates so the same questions and embarrassment followed me. No one knew who the FM was for until it started malfunctioning and I had to help fix it—so that was great (not!)—or when I had to carry it from class to class.
When I got into 5th grade my teacher called it “a magical necklace,” which honestly made things worse, and I could not express this frustration because I knew my teacher was trying their best.
when I felt embarrassed, I wish I could have told myself that even when people ask questions about the FM, by the next day they have usually forgotten about it. Most of the time I cared more than other people did.
When I was younger I believed that my hearing aids defined me in a way where my life revolved around them. As I’ve grown older I have realized that having a hearing loss and wearing hearing aids are not the only things about me. Understanding this has allowed me to grow and change by making stronger connections with friends and other people.
Nowadays as I become friends with new people I never once mention my hearing aids. Over time some figure it out on their own, but I can see the fact that I wear hearing aids is simply not important to them. And now whenever people ask questions about my hearing aids I always answer with patience and understanding, because I owe it to the younger version of myself who never could.
Libby Byxbee is a high school sophomore who lives in Connecticut. She has a bilateral moderate to severe hearing loss.
The Latest Blog Posts
Now in high school looking back over each grade when I felt embarrassed, I wish I could have told myself that even if people ask questions, by the next day they usually forget about this drawing attention to me.