Shared by Sandra Stolnik
Acute Hearing Loss (Part 1)
That morning I'll always keep in mind, Though I wish like a film to rewind it. The morn when I woke up I couldn't hear. I hoped that the silence would disappear. I thought, it'd be better on the next day. It couldn't remain forever this way! I didn't hear what my parents did say When they asked me "Are you feeling okay?" I couldn't not hear even my own voice, Not to mention the outside noise. I panicked, I felt so scared and weird. From a day like this I have always feared. Why was I going through something like this? To hear my own voice how much I missed! I needed to go to my physician, Hoping he could enlighten me about my condition. He decided to make a hearing test Where I tried to hear, and I did my best. I've heard very little, and, frankly, I failed. My doctor saw, I was frightened and pale. He took a sheet to write down what he'd suggest - The moment I've read it, I did start to protest. No, I did not want to be hospitalized. Yet, I did exactly what I was advised. I had to stay for a few days, So they can make some checks & x-rays. I thought - couldn't they give me pills as a cure? There had to be an easy way out, I was sure. At the same time, my hearing dropped to 100 db. I couldn't believe that this happened to me. When I have read it, it was quite a lot! I stood paralyzed there, on the spot. Had I really to receive also infusions? This couldn't be true! It was some sort of illusion, As if I was in trance. I went my way home, Not sure whether I could walk on my own. I counted my own footsteps on the street, Being so lost in my thoughts. I hardly could eat. After some time I wasn't so scared, But for this how could I ever be prepared? To keep my head clear was hard. I couldn't think. I was feeling as if I stood on the brink. Checkings, laying on the hospital bed - This was the moment when I truly felt sad. I did not know whether to sit or to take a nap. In a splinter-sec my life's been just turned into crap!
In 2008 I receive my first acute hearing loss which had a deep impact on me as a poet. I was in hospital. During that time, I tried to keep myself busy, used this experience to fuel my inspiration and I wrote like crazy for the past few months. At that time, I didn't want a surgery, so I tried it with a stronger hearing aid from Phonak. The "hearing volume" was increased a lot and I could hear again. For me it just didn't feel the right time for a cochlear implant. Two years I had my hearing aid and all seemed to work well until I got another acute hearing loss over night, two years later almost around the same time in February 2010. This time I decided to go for a surgery and it was the best decision I have ever made. My hearing is back to what it was before the hearing fluctuation began. At first voices didn't sound good, all felt weird but later my brain learned to adjust to the new input and I started to hear well. At present I have to say that music sounds like music, human voice as well. I can even distinguish between female and male voices. It's all like it once used to be. I have recently published my poems in my book "Can You Hear My Poems" in the hope to spread awareness among the hearing community as well as faith among all who suffer to some degree. The first on top and the one above here, are some of the poems inside my book. I hope you will enjoy them.
We Share The Same Thing
Today I saw a group of children With their teacher taking a ride. Some were involved in deep conversation, Signing or talking, or showing pride. But then look, what do I see? Something was sticking out of their hair. Immediately I started to feel For the same "thing" we shared. I was watching them and I thought, Should I show them mine too? We have something in common. "Hey, I have a processor like you."
Read my story on my blog:
HEARING HEALTH FOUNDATION • 363 Seventh Avenue, 10th Floor • New York, NY 10001-3904 • (212) 257-6140 • (888) 435-6104 TTY •
Terms of Service | Privacy Policy • ©2017 Hearing Health Foundation. All rights reserved.
Hearing Health Foundation does not endorse products or services appearing as paid advertisements in this website.